I have been playing Punch-out! lately (for the Wii), and I just hate Doc Louis, that black coach. In between every round, with Bear Hugger barely losing any health at all, he says something retarded about him loving chocolate bars or something. I think he's trying to come out of the closet to me.
He just sits there, munching on his candy, while I'm getting the living horseshit beat out of me by a stinky-ass redneck.
At the end of every fight or hologram fight, he congratulates me and does some kind of weird dance. He's less entertaining than roadkill in my burger.
Even though it's just a game, his breath wafts from the Wii, reeking horribly of Beanie-Weenies and Sour Cream Doritos. He wears that towel around his neck like he's going to use it, but that's bullshit.
Wait, no he does use it. He gets sweaty climbing up the stairs.
Sometimes when he does that dance, I feel affection for him, I want to hug him. But then he says some stupid-ass metaphor that makes no sense whatsoever, and the hate creeps up my spine again.

GRUMP IT!