Popular Everyday Grumps of the Week

The guy I like is shipping off.

Mon, 26 Jul 2010 02:59:05 +0000

Hes going into the military or whatever. Okay, so I haven't had the balls to tell him I like him yet... I'm getting there!

Damn you military for everything good you take away from me!
(And by everything I mean just him)

When little kids tell you how to play video games

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 07:37:56 +0000

"Ooh, I know where to go!"

"No, press X!!"

"There's this part where..."

Me: -_- "I know. I've been playing this game for 4 years..."

Yet they still continue to tell you more stuffs you already know.

My House being Flooded

Mon, 26 Jul 2010 22:17:58 +0000

Well tonight was a hell of a night. I noticed the weather getting bad outside and then the rain started POURING down. Probably 30 minutes later I look out the window and notice the street is flooded higher than its ever been flooded. I was thinking "holy crap that's gonna reach the door to my house." A little more time passes and I keep hearing this strange tapping outside my door. Since I live in a creepy house I was thinking oh it could be something scary so I stayed in my room. Then I noticed something seeping through the bottom of my door.... could it be ... BLOOD?

Hardly. It was water. Water that was backed up from the street gushing into my house at every wave that crashed into the back door to my house (right next to my bedroom). On further examination I noticed when I walked to the corner of my room the carpet was soggy. Oh wonderful. Now those bastards are infiltrating at all angles!

So I start thinking, what can I do to combat the situation. Towels? Pft. Sandbags? where the hell would I get em? Shamwow? ...hell yes! So I grab the shamwow out of the kitchen, take it to my room and start pounding away at the carpet. I filled my little trash can half full with water! Those shamwows are pretty good. After a while though I was getting tired. So I opted for the little shop vac I had, then I noticed it was spitting out half as much water as it was sucking in so I eventually went to a combo of the shamwow to suck up the water that the shop vac was spitting out.

All in all, I think the shamwow saved the day. But now I'm sleeping with my fan on full blast and moved half the shit in my bedroom to another room of the house. Ugh, I just hope it doesn't get moldy >_<

My Only Ever "Not a Grump" Grump.

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 07:31:48 +0000

Guess what has two thumbs and just landed an internship at the Everson Museum of Art?

THIS GUY!
(now picture me pointing to myself with my thumbs.)

People who think one gender is superior

Wed, 28 Jul 2010 19:13:01 +0000

I really hate people who ramble in all situations about how one gender is "Better" than the other. There IS no better gender, so shut up and stop spouting off crap. The "boys leave their rooms messy and act immature all the time!" aswell as the "girls mature at a much faster rate and are always tidy!" stereotypes are usually never true any more. Everyone is different, so stop assuming an entire gender's actions and attitude unless you've talked to every single boy or girl on the planet.

Can I ask you a question?

Sat, 24 Jul 2010 17:32:09 +0000

Didn't give me a choice there, now, did you.
This. Is a stupid. Question to ask someone. For, in asking someone if you can ask them something, you are asking them something. Without their permission yet.
And I don't see why you would need their permission in the first place.
It's all very silly.

Not Wearing Socks To An Amusment/Water Park

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 09:30:48 +0000

So yesterday me, my cousin, and some friends went to Dorney Park (and Wildwater Kingdom). For some reason I chose not to wear socks so that I didn't have to worry about them when I took my shoes off to go on water rides. Now I have blistares on the side of my feet. So the lesson here is, always wear socks unless you're wearing sandles, flipflops or something else like that. (Let's hope not Crocks.)

Poorly timed jokes

Thu, 29 Jul 2010 12:55:05 +0000

I could probably write books about my history of horrible jokes/anecdotes, told at incredibly bad times and circumstances.

The one that slipped out today would most likely earn me the "Jerk of the year" award. Now in hindsight, I realize how extremely inappropriate and not amusing whatsoever it was.

Too...Many...Children...Also The Worst Feeling In The World.

Tue, 27 Jul 2010 17:23:57 +0000

Ffffffff.

I recently signed up for a week-long art camp that I've been going to for 4 years. Normally I'd be eager to go, but there's this.

I AM THE OLDEST ONE THERE.

The rest of the kids are about 6 and all the chairs are short and I keep tripping over fucking children.
The only people to talk to are the teenaged helpers, and I can't talk to them for long because they have to help first-graders remove a staple from their eyeball or something.
Most of the time there's just a group and me, trying my hardest to fit my wonky-ass knees under the table.
"So this morning I-" I begin.
"TODAY I HAD SUN CHIPS AND THEY WAS GOOD" shouts a small child with a glitter-caked paper plate on her head.
"Yeah. Um. Yeah."
"HAVE YOU EVER TRIED SUN CHIPS LOL THEY IS GOOD"
"Yes. I like Sun Chips."
":DDDDDD"

Every fucking time I try to talk, some dickrabbit interrupts me with either
1. A lame joke
2. A noise that their friends think is hilarious
3. Asking me to draw their assignment for them
4. Touching me

You guys know that I do not enjoy being touched. I don't like it. I really, really don't like it. And when a child fucking taps me with that glue-covered, smelly, glittery hand, I go absolutely apeshit. I try not to strangle them, so I just clench my fists until my knuckles are white and rock back and forth and tune out and hum really loudly.

Have you ever felt the worst feeling in the world?
No. You haven't.

I was pretty depressed one night and I had horrible insomnia. So I thought if I just ate some food, maybe I would have to take a nap.
In this house, there is little you can prepare quietly at five in the morning. So I got a Jamz from my freezer (awful knockoff of Uncrustables) and stuck it in the microwave. After doing that I ate it and it tasted like Castor oil. After dry-heaving I attempted to go to sleep but I couldn't. So since the only things to watch at six in the morning are porn, work-out routines, and Animal Planet, I watched Animal Planet.
So there I sat. Depressed, my mouth tasting like Castor oil, a rash right beside my crotch that burned like bloody hell, awake at ungodly hours, and watching orangutans cross rivers or some shit. Hallucinations were swirling around my head and scratching me and killing me from the inside. Comedy Central doesn't come on until 9:00 AM, what the fuck? I have to wait four hours for something enjoyable to come on. Holy cockturtles. It's horrible.

Bye.
Leave now.

I am waiting for you, dear

Sat, 24 Jul 2010 19:20:41 +0000

Waiting in the rain with no umbrella
I hate it because there is a shiver going down my neck.
Still waiting for my sister to pick me up at the piano studio.
It took three hours for her to realize she didn't pick me up.
I forgive easily but this one pissed me off a bit more than usually.
So i danced in the rain for at least half an hour before I Sat down.
Many people were staring at me while I was dancing.
I wonder why